The Past by Kevin Murphy

Kevin’s response to an earlier trigger ‘The Past’.

The Past by Kevin Murphy

Inspired by Auld Lang Syne

When I was engrossed in genealogy, my wife asked why I was so interested in dead people.I asked why we read books – they are mostly about dead people – even fictitious people, but almost always, except for science fiction, they are, as Stephen King says, based on true character traits.

I did add at the time that it was a was fair comment, so I must look up some old living friends.

So I looked up some old girlfriends.

Truthfully, looking into the past brings up a sense of regret, but much as Piaf’s popular song obviously touches on people’s empathy, I think David Ford more accurately captures on my own sentiment – “I am ashamed. I am ashamed, but I don’t regret anything.”

This is part of having to be careful what I wish for, and therefore be thankful for what we did get or do have instead. All those girls I longed for and either never gained or lost, yet in the end, I did really end up with the best. I am ashamed of some of the stuff I got up, and of hurt I caused, I take it that this is inevitable in love which is as just as war – a to and fro that arrives at a peace, and hopefully a just one.

Sorry, however, I am not going to tell you anything I am ashamed of.

But should I forget old aquaintants simply because they are in the past? My pastime is past times, I read and I write. Doing this helps me to make sense of our world.

I have a friend – he may no longer be a friend – who said of old friends, including wives and girlfriends, ‘I move on’.

I do not.

Of course I do move on, but my old friends, these I have loved, do remain in my heart and thoughts.

(Shame not regret by David Ford)   (Sorry not a brilliantly recorded version, though David Ford himself is excellent.)

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